Your language matters

I am fascinated by language.

When you're learning a new language, you're not simply learning a new way of talking, you are also inadvertently learning a new way of thinking. 

At the early age of 3, I loved learning a second language in pre-school. 

When I spent 3 weeks in Tanzania after high school, I learned enough Swahili to be able to converse with a shopkeeper completely in his language while browsing through his shop. 

In college, I double-majored in Spanish and Economics, took a semester of German and Italian, and studied abroad for a semester to immerse myself in Spanish. 

In my twenties, I spent a year living in Paraguay to continue to improve my Spanish speaking ability.

For me, language has unlocked new worlds, new perspectives, and new ways of thinking. 

Cognitive scientist and professor, Lera Boroditsky, says, ​​“Language is central to our experience of being human, and the languages we speak profoundly shape the way we think, the way we see the world, the way we live our lives.”

Through her research at Stanford and MIT, Boroditsky revisited the commonly-held belief that language did not shape thought. 

She conducted studies that demonstrate the effect language has on cognition. What she and her team learned is that people who speak different languages do indeed think differently, and that even flukes of grammar can profoundly affect how we see the world.

Language not only shapes cognition, it is also generative in nature, and can create our future and shape the opinions, behaviors, and actions of others. 

Photo by Melany Rochester

1. Language shapes thoughts

Have you ever dreaded a task and found yourself saying, “I have to take out the trash,” or whatever your version of that is. 

Your language is shaping your view of the task. 

If you were to simply switch “have to” with “get to,” a new view begins to form. 

“I get to take out the trash” carries in its meaning a sense of privilege. You might begin to appreciate the home where you live, the contribution you are to those you live with, the trash collection service your city/town provides. 

A simple change in language can move you from dread to gratitude. 

How does your language shape your view of the world? What “throw away” language do you use that isn’t serving you? What language could you begin using that will move you from draining thoughts to energizing thoughts?

2. Language is generative and creative

The United States of America was created through an act of language: The Declaration of Independence declared independence from Britain.

In 1962, John F. Kennedy said, “we choose to go to the moon.” By speaking this into the world, and through the herculean efforts that rallied to make it possible, seven years later, Neil Armstrong set foot on the moon.

Any business that ever existed started as an idea that was spoken into the world.

Parents use language to shape their children. The language and expressions you heard as a child likely formed your beliefs and mindset. Consider these common phrases:

• “Money doesn’t grow on trees” - how does this shape money mindset?

• “Be good/be a good boy/girl” - what is implied here about innate goodness?

• “You’re so smart!” - what does this teach about a growth mindset when we face something challenging?

What about things we say to ourselves when feel doubt or fear about trying new things:

• “I have no idea what I’m doing,”

• “I’m terrified,”

• “I can’t do this,”

Simple shifts in language can have a massive impact on your outlook. What if you replaced those phrases with: 

• “This may feel new, but I can do new, and I can do scary.”

• “I can feel the fear and do it anyway. That is the definition of courage.”

• “I’ve figured stuff out before, and I can summon that ability again.”

Your word creates your world. What aspirations and dreams do you have? Start speaking them out into the world. This is part of living a created life.

3. Language moves others

Adam Smith wrote in The Theory of Moral Sentiments that the basic function of language is that people want to be believed. People want to shape other people’s opinions, to be followed, to be influencers. Language, effectively, is a tool for being followed.

J.K. Rowling wrote that “Words are … our most inexhaustible source of magic. Capable of both inflicting injury, and remedying it.”

JFK said that the only reason to give a speech is to change the world. 

Any good story teller will use the power of language to elicit emotion and move the listener from where they are to where they want them to be. 

Daniel Pink’s book, To Sell is Human, describes that ability we have as humans to use language to move others. In much of life, we are using language to persuade, influence, pitch, and cajole. 

Who are the people in your life you are trying to move? If you look at almost any relationship, you are either collaborating, serving, agreeing, inviting, enrolling, persuading, convincing, exchanging, or delivering. 

How effective is your use of language at moving others? How can you change your language to be more effective? 

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Pay attention to your language. What do you notice? What tiny shift will you make moving forward?